This I promise you, tomorrow the winter will be over. Just one night sleep and the cycling season will start for real with the “Omloop Het Volk” (I don’t care about paper sponsorships) and I’ll guarantee you we’ll have some great tactics, speed, climbing, zotte acties, cobblestones, disappointment, wind, possibly some rain and hopefully all riders will stay on their bicycles. Jaaaaaaaaa, lente… kom er maar in.

Dies ist een Scheissmovie! Aber ich weiss dass es auch deutschen Fans hier auf’m Fuccit gibt, die gerne Pornos anschauen, die Hölle (means HELL), ich glaube, die meisten Porno kommt aus Deutschland. Leider habe ich nie viel als Fahrradkurier bemerkt. Jedoch auf der anderen Seite … wenn es diese Junk wie im Film gewesen war, hatte ich wohl sein lassen. Gut für Menschen die lentetietjes und Deutschsprachigen lieben. Tschuss

This guy rode (although extremely slow) for my bikemessenger company a couple of times which makes him some kind of exenger. He now organises an event for the Good Cause and I haven’t got a clue what it’s about but it’s got bikes involved and probably a shitload of fun. “A.S.O. / Kleurstoff.. check it out!!!” is bound to happen in our pretty little town, Arnhemse Shit Ouwe

All bicyclemessengers across the globe are dangerous morons

Not really something to do with bikes but important enough to say: Hey fuccit, this needs to be heard! He Vince! Kom je zaterdag ook even langs op onze demo? Wordt leuk! Ik hoorde dat Wilders, Rutte en Verhagen ook iets hadden tegen fietsers, laat staan met een koeriersverleden. O, en check de flyer die ik als bijlage meestuur. Als dat niet de lelijkste flyer ooit is… Grt, M (ex-bikemessenger & pre-fakenger & selfproclaimed Style-Icon)

Besides… how fuccit can it get with an amateuristic drawing of what is supposed to look like a middlefinger

My fairly brandnew Kona Paddy Wagon is for sale cause I already quit being a bikemessenger last year and now I don’t wanna be a fakenger any longer either. Please help getting me out of my depression and buy this toy from me. This could really be that right opportunity for you to do something good for humanity. I just wanna be normal again and go for a walk to the supermarket

Dear Winterseason, you’ve probably done a lot of good to many people even though I still don’t understand jackshit why you happen. But please go away now and make some room for the healthy warmth of spring, sleeveless cycling in shorts without neopreen overshoes and lentetietjes… thanx

The nonsense on this website needs to go. Out with the repeating stupidity… in with the renewing intelligence. Or at least subjects we can relate to. I shit you not, I’ve had it up to here with the constant reposting of “cool stuff” other people from abroad already liked on their websites. Let’s hear it for and from Arnhem! Let’s talk about a local poet: Johnny van Doorn aka the selfkicker. Apparently he’s dead, which makes it even most coolest cause: A. he’s a dead poet now and B. he’s getting a statue on het Brouwersplein in the city centre. I can ride my bicycle over and be all cultural and all in my own hometown. Crazy, innit, no internet, nothing, just me my bike and Johhny van Doorn.

Okeeej, it’s a facebook thingy. Or at least a bicyclecouriers thang. So maybe this page is not to be read by all of you but here’s the idea: International Bike Messenger Pancake Day, donderdag 18 november · 5:00 – 20:00. Haha, it almost sounds silly when writing this post cause what’s the big deal about het gezamelijk eten van pannenkoeken worldwide. Well it’s about bikemessengers and their stuff and we wouldn’t be fakengers fuccing fietskoeriers if we weren’t going to eat pancakes too, Gnagnagna, here we go again.

Tweet